I really like Complacent Panda's latest posting on "Motives". Perhaps coz it brought up a number of points that I can really subscribe to.
From time to time, I ask myself why I'm still blogging.
The answer is always this: my blog is a place where I can dump my thoughts - both toxic and benign. It's a place I feel safe enough to speak my mind, be myself, and from where I get a little interaction with fellow human beings. It's primarily a trading blog still of course - where I keep track of my progress and stockpile my trading ideas and plans.
The reason I want to write as little as possible on non-trading related matters is so that those who are here to take a peek at the life of someone who trades fulltime will not find the visit a waste of their time. Somehow, along the way, I started to actually want this blog to benefit others too. I'm still insisting that my writing doesn't educate. But for those who are curious about the struggles of a woman who was raised to embrace non-capitalist values, who knew next to nothing about investing and trading before, and who's now aspiring to someday be able to trade for a living, I hope my blog will at least give them a rough idea...
A warning to those who chance upon this personal space of mine - I'm not a particularly cheery person, and although I totally advocate positive thinking, I'm still very far from being able to do that on a consistent basis. I suffer from chronic depression since I turned 17, and am on long-term medication to keep my blood pressure down and my brain from firing too many signals (to do crazy things). Unprovoked, I'm nice, generally. I was raised the very traditionally Chinese way by an English educated father (who didn't know how to write his name in Chinese) - yes that means I got a fair amount of spankings as a kid, always greet my elders and say my pleases and thank yous, and smile A LOT - and self-control is my 3rd motto. What that means is that you won't see a lot of expletives even when I'm really, really mad. So, just because I'm not swearing and cursing doesn't necessarily mean that I'm not frustrated or pissed. I am an emotional person, and bad trades affect me. When I'm not ecstatically happy, it usually means I'm either pissed or downright depressed.
If you trade, and are somewhat of a moody person, my trading journey and results might offer an insight as to whether there's really any truth in the popular saying that only the emotionally inert should trade. To the best of my knowledge, most traders are consistently depressed.
And I'm a woman. So expect me to have more mood swings than the general trading population.
From time to time, I ask myself why I'm still blogging.
The answer is always this: my blog is a place where I can dump my thoughts - both toxic and benign. It's a place I feel safe enough to speak my mind, be myself, and from where I get a little interaction with fellow human beings. It's primarily a trading blog still of course - where I keep track of my progress and stockpile my trading ideas and plans.
The reason I want to write as little as possible on non-trading related matters is so that those who are here to take a peek at the life of someone who trades fulltime will not find the visit a waste of their time. Somehow, along the way, I started to actually want this blog to benefit others too. I'm still insisting that my writing doesn't educate. But for those who are curious about the struggles of a woman who was raised to embrace non-capitalist values, who knew next to nothing about investing and trading before, and who's now aspiring to someday be able to trade for a living, I hope my blog will at least give them a rough idea...
A warning to those who chance upon this personal space of mine - I'm not a particularly cheery person, and although I totally advocate positive thinking, I'm still very far from being able to do that on a consistent basis. I suffer from chronic depression since I turned 17, and am on long-term medication to keep my blood pressure down and my brain from firing too many signals (to do crazy things). Unprovoked, I'm nice, generally. I was raised the very traditionally Chinese way by an English educated father (who didn't know how to write his name in Chinese) - yes that means I got a fair amount of spankings as a kid, always greet my elders and say my pleases and thank yous, and smile A LOT - and self-control is my 3rd motto. What that means is that you won't see a lot of expletives even when I'm really, really mad. So, just because I'm not swearing and cursing doesn't necessarily mean that I'm not frustrated or pissed. I am an emotional person, and bad trades affect me. When I'm not ecstatically happy, it usually means I'm either pissed or downright depressed.
If you trade, and are somewhat of a moody person, my trading journey and results might offer an insight as to whether there's really any truth in the popular saying that only the emotionally inert should trade. To the best of my knowledge, most traders are consistently depressed.
And I'm a woman. So expect me to have more mood swings than the general trading population.
11 comments:
I am fascinated by you, just came across this blog.
"To the best of my knowledge, most traders are consistently depressed." - i thought it was that depressed people became traders cos all you need is face the wall and the PC? Hmm...
So, chicken or egg first???
No wonder, your English is so good. I know of 2 traders with the 'mood' problem. Both take medicine and keep it under control. One had to keep on trying diff brand with diff dosage until he found the one that clicked. He also found that the Eastern philosophy (namely everybody dies soon or later) help him to wait it out when he has an panic attack. Just want you to know you are not alone, peace.
Thank you, Cory :-) I'm glad i didnt' have to experiment with different medication. My doctor is wonderful and medication has been keeping my panic attacks away too. Yes I know I'm not alone. But knowing is one thing, feeling is quite another :-)
Sea,
I didn't choose to trade so I can face the wall...but yes..I do like my glass wall (I can watch fashion tv when I trade! LOL!!)...
FXFL,
Thank you :-) Crazy people get your attention? :-)
You have a great style of writing - I'm joining the Jules fan club.
I'm relatively a beginner when it comes to trading, and like most others my biggest challenge is controlling my emotions and staying disciplined. Reading about how other traders think and manage their emotions is fascinating to me, because I think trading does accentuate your personality (and I've found many flaws in mine).
Thanks for being so open and sharing with us.
Another Ayn Rand lover! :-) Thanks, Catalyst, for joining my "fan club". I have to tell my sister the Seabloke that I actually have a fan club! LOL!
About my writing - my blog was originally meant for Seabloke's and D's eyes, so I have to write in a way that they can understand. Seabloke won't read anything that a 12-year old cannot comprehend - that's why I don't write between the lines (she can't read there you see :-D).
Agreed that trading brings out the best and worst in a person. One thing I noticed is that if you don't deal with something in real life, it affects your trading in exactly the same way it affects your life. For instance, some people have problem letting go of things (HOARDING) - I'm a good example (I will mourn over a favorite blouse I've worn for 12 years which D forces me to throw out) - and they are those that are likely to keep bad trades. Totally talking about me LOL!
I see you posted your first blog. If you like to write, and talk to yourself, you'll find it extremely fulfilling :-D
Don't think that if you don't BOLD and make (hideous) GREEN my nick, i won't know you're talking about me ok...
Wow, you really read everything I write, Sea! I feel honored!! :-)
not everything... in fact not MOST things you write cos trading baffles me!
i'm narcissistic (darn, why don't you have spell check), i'm only drawn to my own nick
(^@^)
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