Friday, March 19, 2010

Beautiful Life

Friday, March 19, 2010

I start work next week.

This officially ends my 2-year depression.

D says to take it that I had spent the last 2 years pursuing a masters degree - after all, I did pay the market a hefty fee to learn to trade.

I have been sim trading the whole time that I stopped posting. I recognized I wasn't in the right frame of mind to trade real money. And during the time that I was sim trading, I noticed that my best trades (commodities and forex futures) were those taken after 12pm N.Y. time. That would be 12am my time, which is perfect for me when I start work - it means I'll have plenty of time to have dinner, play with my cat, and pick what I am going to wear the following day before I settle down to study my charts.

Another thing that made me really happy: they've made a movie from my favorite book (the book that kept me sane these 2 years - Elizabeth Gilbert's account of how she spent an entire night on the floor of her bathroom crying, and her subsequent decision to leave her normal life behind - her comfort zone - to explore the unknown in Italy, then India - totally captured my heart. She's like a twin - her experiences, her character, her likes and dislikes...even the part about her never having been alone ie. without a man since she was 15....anyway, trailer below)


Wednesday, March 10, 2010

6E Trade - Wed, Mar 10

Wednesday, March 10, 2010
6E 15min
6E 2min

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Crude Oil Trade - Tues, Mar 9

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

An interesting email from someone I'll call "The Banker":

Hi Jules,

Thanks for your kind words! I am glad to read on your blog the search for who you are is over.

Trading the US time zone from Singapore did pose significant struggles in my social life initially. Over time, I'm glad my family and friends gradually accepted my warped hours. I was very much a hermit. I could spend several weeks at home without stepping out of my house at all. However, I found that was unhealthy and abandoned my hermit lifestyle.

And yes, I was swing trading during the period when I was very successful. The secret to my method is, there is none! If any, it would be my firm belief that the market is bigger than any one of us. Very few can influence prices significantly, so we must adapt to the market instead of "forcing" (or hoping) the market to move according to our analysis.

A very simple analogy could be seen in, say, Formula One racing. All circuits have twists and bends. Can the driver simply step on the pedal full throttle all the time? Likewise, the market has trending and consolidation phases which demand different methods. So the trader that can exercise the greatest discipline to not trade in "unfamiliar territories" wins! Correspondingly, he'll need courage and swift action to take positions when he identifies potential moves.

Ironically, I tried teaching my trading method free to some very learned friends. None succeeded, even though I held nothing back. After this episode, I have to agree that the trading method is the least important factor to anyone's success in trading. I subsequently found so many methods actually work. The real questions are, can our emotions handle the roller coaster? Do we have enough faith in the methods to let them work? Do we have the discipline to adhere to the plans? The book by Mike Douglas "Trading in the Zone" answered all these questions the best.

I sat on this note coz I really haven't been in the mood to blog. But I like what The Banker says about not trading in "unfamiliar territories" so much that I feel compelled to share it. His note strikes a chord - in the month of Feb, I had changed the way I executed my trades, and that had cost me. It didn't help that I was also distracted by non-trading related matters. I took what was to me a rather long break to regroup. During that period, and in the weeks before, I've been receiving emails from those on my blogroll, friends who are not traders, and people I've never met or spoken with in my life (e.g. The Banker). Each has given me something to ponder on, and for that, I am very grateful....

Austin, I love all your notes. You're very long-winded, and I don't know how to respond. Just know that I'm extremely touched :-)

J (my chat buddy) left a note for me today. He was trying to cheer me up after I failed to show up. This was how he attempted to console me: by telling me how terrible a life others (from around the world) are living. Well, thank you, J, you sure made me feel terribly guilty for being melancholic for no good reason. :-P Ok, seriously, you know that I always love what you say.

Ben (you know who you are), I took your advice and didn't respond to your email. See? I listen sometimes. :-D Thank you, Ben, you're very sweet.

To all others who wrote: I don't know when I would be able to finish all the mails I was supposed to have sent out - I am really beginning to run out of things to say...

I am not attention seeking; I write because it is therapeutic for me (I don't believe in keeping a diary that's for my eyes only - it's a superstitious thing that I am not in the mood to elaborate on).

That said, the notes and letters have warmed my heart.

Here's one from weeks back that still makes me smile:

Hi Jules,

worries me when I read your latest post. Forgive me for being 'busy body'. Maybe you should check on these areas and reflect on the causes of your current state of emotions. Provide my personal assessment below each.

1) Family ( besides spouse )
Not lacking. Seems ok in this aspect becos of your frequent mention of sis and nieces.

2) Spouse
Lacking. I dont think you love ur partner from your postings. It's seems more like out of convenience and benefits.

3) Friendship
Lacking. Try to establish communication with the few closest friends u have who care about you.

4) Work satisfaction
Lacking ? I'm not sure about tis. But i guess its lacking due to the uncertainties of trading. Suggest you find something u like on a permanent basis ( part time ? ) which will not affect your trading if u really want to continue.

5) Social
Lacking. Need to make an effort to be less suspicious and accept the imperfections of others.

I briefly touch on the above since I'm not sure how you take these. Anyway, sincerely hope happy occasions come your way and the current depressive mode goes away.

My first trade after D's motivational talk last night (story for another day):

CL 15min
CL 2min

Thursday, March 4, 2010

NYT's "Depression's Upside"

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Depression's Upside

I wonder: should I feel happy now??

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Failed Hanging Men

CL 10min
First week of the month is for puking:
1st failed hanging man cost me 4 points; the 2nd and 3rd helped me recover my 4 points. That's basically what the day has been about: hanging men, or hammer (whatever, sometimes I can't quite tell if the trend's up or down - in any case, I really shouldn't have held a short because of a hanging man - in fact, I really shouldn't have taken that 2nd short since I suck at trading off S & R alone).

I've been in a very foul mood - after taking a USD 400 loss in a single trade, I went to look for D at the lobby (something I do every evening), and told him I felt very poor. D roared. Cruel.

I'm really NOT looking forward to tomorrow's interview.

Typical Monday

Just when I thought oil was ugly, 6J was grotesque. I could totally feel that I wasn't selling to and buying from humans.
6J 10min
Will be away from the market for most part of this week. Interviews. Everyone finally came back from the very long new year break.

Lily Allen (surprisingly nice song):