D

I'm a typical INTJ; D, a typical ISTJ.

One of the traits that INTJs and ISTJs share is this: they think they are always right.

Under normal circumstances, it would have been impossible for D and me to live under the same roof for 15 days, let alone 15 years.

There's something about D that makes it agonizingly hard for me to tear myself away from him.

He's wise.

In the 15 years that I've been with D, he has taught me many things. Had it not been for him, my life would have been a mess. I would not have gotten my degree, and I would most probably have turned out to be just like my mother.

Something that he's told me recently got me thinking about what kind of a person I really want to be.

Do I want to continue to insist on getting my way - at the expense of others - and be eternally unhappy despite getting what I want?

Or is it time to step out of my shoes into those of others so that I can appreciate what they want and find happiness by giving instead of taking?

When I chose the latter, I had no idea how easy it is to just live and let live and how therapeutic it is to not have to keep tabs on whether things around me are working out as I wanted them to.

When the going gets tough these days ie. when I don't get my way, I look within myself - not so much for reasons, logics and answers anymore - but for peace.

And I'm gradually seeing the benefit of not looking for something or someone to blame when I'm upset: I haven't the reason to continue to be upset anymore.

D has this innate ability of constantly finding a way to keep moving forward in the face of adversity. He doesn't give his adversaries - human or inorganic - any power to control his state.

And this is the kind of person I want to be, someday.