6E Trades 6/10 (Wed) - Jumbling Blundering Mishmash Of Longs

Blunder: Traded the ES when I meant to trade the 6E.

Blunder: Hit "buy market" 4 times on the 1st 6E trade. My brain wasn't registering anything my fingers were doing, I gather. When I saw +4 on the DOM, I freaked. I utterly hate the number "4". So I got 1 contract out of the way almost immediately, at 1-tick loss. Kept 3 contracts and removed my hard stop. Price was NOT going up, of course, and the only thing I could do was to focus on keeping calm. Went over the reason that I had entered the trade, and was convinced that the reason was valid. Any signs that market was no longer doing what I thought it would do would have sent me bailing at any cost. 6E is a monster, and loves to plunge. (Still fresh in my mind is the day it took USD 2500 from me in a single trade on a SINGLE contract, coz it just wouldn't stop going down - never seen anything like this ever before - and I froze!)

I eventually got out where I wanted to get out - at trendline resistance. The gain of USD165 felt PRECIOUS....until a setup appeared a few candles later. I decided that since I've had the ultimate fright of the year, nothing else was going to give me a heart attack today. I went long on 2 contracts. Had a hard time getting out. Slippage was terrible. I had to time my exit at market and there was no good time to cover except when market was soaring 5 to 6 ticks in seconds. I had to give up my targeted 1.4090 exit as a result. I wanna cry.

Am taking a break - I need food and sleep, and NICOTINE!!!

Sea,
You're probably the only one that knows my frustration. I do the most unthinkable, impossible things on a REGULAR BASIS (you've lost count, I know) - it's like my brain just decides to take breaks as and when it fancies without giving me any heads-up!! I'm hazardous to all living and non-living things around me! My cave is not adequate in containing me; I need a bunker.